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Harriet Miers Questionnaire

October 20th, 2005 | by Jersey McJones |

My contacts at the White House (the white house across the street from the bagel shop in town) have managed to secure for me the Senate Judiciary Questionnaire as filled out by Associate Justice nominee Harriet Miers. At least, it might be that. I have to say, I don’t know what all the fuss is about, but take a look for yourself and see what you think. Here’s a sample of some of the questions which have apparently caused the Senators’ consternation over the brevity and lack of insight of the answers given them:

#13 How would you as a former White House staffer and Personal Attorney to the President comport your position on the Bench should a case come before you in which this Administration would be Plaintiff or Respondent?

#28 How do you feel the current President has handled the SCOTUS, generally speaking? I could not possibly comment on how President handles his Scotus. It would seem highly inappropriate.

#62 Do you believe the Supreme Court made the right decision in Roe v Wade? What’s a "Roe v Wade"?

#76 Griswold v Connecticut overturned that state’s law prohibiting the use of contraceptives by married couples. This decision was based on the interpreted Right of Privacy inferred by the Constitution.Do you agree with the Griswold Decision? Do you believe there is a Constitutional Right to Privacy? I’ve never met Griswold, so I don’t know what his decision would be. As for the Right to Privacy, I feel it is my Private Right not to answer that.

#81 Who is your favorite Supreme Court Justice of all time? Judge Larry Joe - don’t mess with that Texan!

#106 You’ve never been married. Do you feel that would color your Jurisprudence when confronted with marital issues on the bench? I have nothing against married colored people.

#111 Why do you believe the President has chosen you for the SCOTUS? How dare you? The President has never done such a thing! And why are you so interested in the President’s Scotus? He’s not Bill Clinton, you know.

She’s gonna be a great nominee.

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  1. 5 Responses to “Harriet Miers Questionnaire”

  2. By Jersey McJones on Oct 20, 2005 | Reply

    Okay, obviously I lack the intellectual tools for the simple friggin job of posting a simple friggin post around here!!! Help!!!!

  3. By The Bastard on Oct 20, 2005 | Reply

    Do you think she makes breakfast in the morning or just tells you to get out?

    Because she sure looks like the landlord from Kingpin. You know the one that says

    “Something about good sex makes me want to take a crap!”

  4. By Jersey McJones on Oct 20, 2005 | Reply

    She looks like one of those vampire ladies who must drink blood to look young but hasn’t had a pint in a while…

  5. By Jimmy on Oct 20, 2005 | Reply

    I was thinking that she looks more like Emperor Palpatine from Star Wars. I can totally picture her shooting blue lightning from her hands at some abortion doctor.

  6. By Joe Snitty on Oct 20, 2005 | Reply

    That reminds me - I’ve been wondering something for a while now. If the accepted acronym for the Supreme Court of the US is ‘SCOTUS’, does that make the acronym for a republican appointed to the Supreme Court ‘SCROTUS’???

    I stand by my first impression from early October, though. I’m 99% sure that Harriet Miers is Michael Brown in a dress.

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