Bring It On!

Las Vegas Story

May 20th, 2007 | by steve |

So on Friday Night after dinner, me and my sister in law rolled in the Jeep Commander I rented, down to Downtown Las Vegas from the Venetian. Let me tell you, what a change…

We parked at a garage behind Binion’s and went out to see the light show above the old strip down there. The whole place filled with degenerates, whinos, trash and other interesting people. (It felt like home actually!) But I understand how so many people can go to Vegas and go there and do it cheap.

So what does this have to do with politics?

I went into Binion’s on the way out and stopped a $10 black jack table. I am a pretty good player. Been known to rake it in on small stakes tables. So at this table are a young college age, Bill Gates type who totally didn’t fit in downtown and an older friend of his. Both loaded on Jack N Coke; probably been there for hours because one noticed it “just got dark out” at 11pm.

So there I sit, with my silk Tommy Bahama pants and shirt like I stepped off the beach for a Mai Tai.

“I ain’t playin with this son of a bitch”, the older guy says to the dealer, with a southern sort of drawl.

I just smile. My sister in law is confused.

The kid and the older guy are babbling to each other while the dealer shuffles.

“Hey, ” the kid says, “My friend here says he don’t like you.”

“Okay” I go.

The older guy pipes, “I just got’s to ask ya. Where you from? I ain’t playin cards with no liberal, communist Californian.”

I smirk. “Sacramento.”

“Oh fuck! I ain’t… I am out. Fuck this… fuck all… I am going to bed… Fuck you and fuck California, you fucking Communist!!”

The kid is laughing his ass off. I played it straight. My sister in law is afraid I am gonna throw down.

“Listen,” I say, as the dealer is counting the guy out. “What makes you think I am a liberal? You don’t know me from Adam. You’d be suprised how unliberal Sacramento is.”

The kid is laughing… The older guys is still going on with his Communist fuck alls.

“He said he was leaving if you were Californian, and you were… That is too fucking funny, ” the kid says.

“Look… I can prove I am not liberal.” I say as I reach for my keys to show him the Hummer key. “See?”

“That don’t prove shit you Communist!” The old guy says, “You still are from California.”

He gets up and walks off. The kid stays and we chat for a moment. My sister in law totally mesmorized by the whole thing the asks, “Wait! Where is he from?”

“You can’t tell? It’s completely freaking obvious…” I say as I look at the kid, ‘They are from Kentucky!”

The dealer just busts up. The kid later goes onto to tell me in great detail how much Kentuckites hate California. Perhaps if there was a state that was the complete opposite, it would be Kentucky.

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  1. 13 Responses to “Las Vegas Story”

  2. By Tom Harper on May 20, 2007 | Reply

    Interesting story.

    My guess is that guy was just an asshole. I’ve driven through Kentucky several times with California plates. Friendly people; never had any hassles.

  3. By Steve O on May 21, 2007 | Reply

    WTF? Yep I agree with Tom , asshole indeed!!!!!

    But I gotta ask, what does owning a Hummer have to do with not being a Liberal?

    I own a SUV and I could care fucking less who else owns one, why? Because I also own a Harley that gets worse mileage than a Humvee but the tree hugging schmucks are too stupid to realize that. Oh, bike, must save energy, it’s smaller than a car. Idiots!

    Sometimes “Liberal” has nothing to do with environment!!! People must have their toys and I’m sorry, you will have to wrestle my Harley out of my dead drunken hands. How about we fix our foreign policy first?????

  4. By steve on May 21, 2007 | Reply

    Man… I don’t know… It was Binions…

  5. By Dusty on May 21, 2007 | Reply

    I broke down in Kentucky when I was driving alone cross country, outside of Louisville..they were the nicest folks in the world..a couple of gents even helped me change out my water pump in the parking lot of the Auto Supply Store.

    Downtown LV is weird as I hate going down there, but I catch some good music at one of the decent hotels still there, I forget the name..afterall it is 4 fucking am and I can’t sleep, my back is killing me and I just read a hilarious but disturbing story about Dr. Laura’s soldier kid, which I posted here.

  6. By Jersey McJones on May 21, 2007 | Reply

    You got lucky, Tom.

    I was driving through Kentuky with Cali plates back in the late eighties. I was heading for southern Ohio, a town called Ironton. I got off the freeway to get some gas. As I pulled out of the gas station, a Kentucky cop sees me, my long hair, and my ‘79 Toyota with the Cali plates. He’s driving the other way. I know what he’s going to do. I zip onto the road back toward the freeway, I look behind and see the cop whipping a hard u-turn at me. There’s a line of cars stopped up on the on-ramp. I see a wide shoulder on the left side of the ramp. I hit the gas and ride up the shoulder onto the freeway, seeing my intiative, a bunch of cars pull out behind me onto the shoulder - blocking the cop, though I don’t think they saw him coming. There was a ton of traffic. I buzzed up through it and outta there.

    If you’re from Cali - be careful in Kentucky. No one hates there fellow Americans more than Bible Belters. It’s not true of all of them, but it’s true of enough of them to be a serious threat.


  7. By tos on May 21, 2007 | Reply

    My family lives in the south,Tennessee,Atlanta,Kentucky and they are the most hospitable and friendliest down home type people. Too bad they get stereotyped because we can learn alot from their southern hospitality instead of some of the arrogance that us yankees have.

  8. By Paul Watson on May 22, 2007 | Reply

    You mean like that wonderful tolerance that was displayed to the idiots of Top Gear when they drove through Alabama with their ‘hilariously’ decorated cars?

  9. By Paul Watson on May 22, 2007 | Reply

    And I know that they were trying to get a reaction. But that doesn’t change the fact they got one, and a violent one at that. And I also know it’s not representative of that part of America, any more than parts of San Francisco is representative of the North. I’ve got some good friends in the South and have had good times when I visit. I just keep my mouth shut about politics.

  10. By tos on May 22, 2007 | Reply

    Paul I am not familiar with that story. Do you have a link?

  11. By Dusty on May 22, 2007 | Reply

    Smart move on not discussing politics Paul.

  12. By Paul Watson on May 22, 2007 | Reply

    It was posted on BIO a few months ago. Short form: A bunch of British tv presenters of what used to be a car show and has since become mini-Jackass painted their cars with such friendly slogans as “Hilary for President”, “NASCAR sux” and “Man love rules” and took a drive through Alabama. They got the reaction they expected. Amazingly none of them were injured.
    As I amended, to say that is typical of a normal reaction in the South is very unfair. But it is a part of things. Just as San Francisco or Boston are part of the North, but not all of it.

  13. By Paul Watson on May 22, 2007 | Reply

    And here it is, code permitting

  14. By tos on May 22, 2007 | Reply

    Ah yes now I remember. Video no longer available. I had left a comment on that thread that was obviously deleted in which I said “Try driving through New Orleans with “Rap Sucks” on your car and see how you come out of it. My guess is probably not alive. Or any other Urban area for that matter. I’ll bet they’d be afraid to try that one don’t you think?

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