Bring It On!

John McCain Gets Inspiration from Yogi Berra

October 29th, 2008 | by Steve O |

No sooner had I finished watching the next president of the United States address the nation and my in-box lights up with an e-mail from no other than the Maverick himself. That’s right, I got an e-mail from John McCain and this is what he had to say;

My Friends,

Throughout this election season, I’ve been reminded of the Yogi Berra quote, “It ain’t over till it’s over.” My friends, I’m telling you today, this election is not over and we need everyone’s hard work in the coming days to be victorious.

I couldn’t get past the first sentence without shaking my head and questioning what I had just read.

First off, how many of you out there are old enough to remember who the fuck Yogi Berra is?

Secondly, there is nobody else in recent fucking history that could inspire you to fight on?

And thirdly, lets get back to the first question and look at other quotes from this man you say inspired you throughout this election;

  1. A nickel ain’t worth a dime anymore.
  2. All pitchers are liars or crybabies.
  3. Always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise they won’t come to yours.
  4. Baseball is ninety percent mental and the other half is physical.
  5. Congratulations. I knew the record would stand until it was broken.
  6. Even Napoleon had his Watergate.
  7. Half the lies they tell about me aren’t true.
  8. He hits from both sides of the plate. He’s amphibious.
  9. How can you think and hit at the same time?
  10. I always thought that record would stand until it was broken.
  11. I just want to thank everyone who made this day necessary.
  12. I never blame myself when I’m not hitting. I just blame the bat and if it keeps up, I change bats. After all, if I know it isn’t my fault that I’m not hitting, how can I get mad at myself?
  13. I never said most of the things I said.
  14. I think Little League is wonderful. It keeps the kids out of the house.
  15. I wish I had an answer to that because I’m tired of answering that question.
  16. I’m a lucky guy and I’m happy to be with the Yankees. And I want to thank everyone for making this night necessary.
  17. I’m not going to buy my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did.
  18. If people don’t want to come out to the ball park, nobody’s gonna stop ‘em.
  19. If the world was perfect, it wouldn’t be.
  20. If you ask me anything I don’t know, I’m not going to answer.
  21. If you come to a fork in the road, take it.
  22. If you don’t know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.
  23. In baseball, you don’t know nothing.
  24. In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is.
  25. It ain’t over till it’s over.
  26. It ain’t the heat, it’s the humility.
  27. It gets late early out there.
  28. It was impossible to get a conversation going, everybody was talking too much.
  29. It’s like deja-vu, all over again.
  30. It’s pretty far, but it doesn’t seem like it.
  31. Little League baseball is a very good thing because it keeps the parents off the streets.
  32. Nobody goes there anymore. It’s too crowded.
  33. Slump? I ain’t in no slump… I just ain’t hitting.
  34. So I’m ugly. So what? I never saw anyone hit with his face.
  35. The future ain’t what it used to be.
  36. The future isn’t what it used to be.
  37. The only color I don’t have is navy brown.
  38. The other teams could make trouble for us if they win.
  39. The towels were so thick there I could hardly close my suitcase.
  40. There are some people who, if they don’t already know, you can’t tell ‘em.
  41. We have deep depth.
  42. We made too many wrong mistakes.
  43. When you arrive at a fork in the road, take it.
  44. You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I’m not hungry enough to eat six.
  45. You can observe a lot by just watching.
  46. You got to be careful if you don’t know where you’re going, because you might not get there.
  47. You got to be very careful if you don’t know where you’re going, because you might not get there.
  48. You should always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise, they won’t come to yours.
  49. You wouldn’t have won if we’d beaten you.
  50. You’ve got to be very careful if you don’t know where you are going, because you might not get there.

That explains sooooo much.

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  1. 4 Responses to “John McCain Gets Inspiration from Yogi Berra”

  2. By steve on Oct 29, 2008 | Reply

    Um… most of the white folks know who Yogi was is.

  3. By Steve O on Oct 29, 2008 | Reply

    It all fits in with “My fellow prisoners”

  4. By Jet Netwal on Oct 30, 2008 | Reply

    I remember Yogi, and Boo Boo too. Does that make me old?

  5. By Lisa on Oct 30, 2008 | Reply

    I heard it was nothing short of a well scripted ,staged,rehearsed,short on substance big on style,Hollywood production paid for with cough,cough,public finance contributions.
    Our souls are broken and only Obama has the healing power to fix them. Follow him into the light right towards that big wooden barrel.
    The are working so hard to make sure he gets elected and when he wins they are going to work just as hard to convince (some)people that he is the greatest president this country has ever seen.You know like they did with Clinton. Even when more people are struggling they will have us convinced there is still hope and change looming.

    It will be a positive struggle because we need to sacrifice(struggle) even more because we are such a selfish, uncaring people we need to
    work harder and give more.

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