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Archive for the ‘Contributors’ Category

Dorian Gray Aboard the Straight Talk Express

Friday, September 19th, 2008

John McCain is a changed man. He seems to have gone from scrappy old dude to doddering old dude in the past few weeks. Could it be the addition of Alaska's First Dude and wife to the campaign that kicked off the whole Republican era of Extreme DudatudeTM? Rumors have circulated ...

Little Man in the Big Spotlight

Monday, September 8th, 2008

John McCain relishes his self-annointed role as a maverick. He mentions it as often as he mentions being a POW and he mentions that as often as Rudy Guiliani mentions 9/11. In his maverick myth, the hero - played poorly by McCain - is a sort of modern day Yosemite ...

Lynn Westmoreland: Everything’s Better When it ‘Sits on a Ritz’

Friday, September 5th, 2008

DOH! Everyone says something stupid sooner or later, it's the curse of the error-prone connection between the human brain and mouth. When the average person tastes gritty shoe leather in their pie hole, they stop, apologize, and everyone moves on. But politicians aren't like you and me. Take the case of Georgia ...

Collateral Damage: Palin Hits Family With Friendly Fire

Tuesday, September 2nd, 2008

Okay, I took my cheap shots at Sarah Palin yesterday. In some ways I'm almost embarrassed by how easy it was, but I like the taste of fresh-shot fish from the barrel slathered in some Matanuska Valley lemon-butter. Now it's time to come back to Earth. The Internets are atwitter about ...

We, the People of Topsyturvistan

Thursday, August 14th, 2008

"We, the people of the great (or not) state of Topsyturvistan are proud (or not) to nominate (or not) Hillary Clinton (or not) as the next President (or not) of these great (or not) United (or not) States of America! (or not!)" The clock's ticking down to the Democratic convention and ...

A Roadie for the Rock Star

Thursday, August 7th, 2008

Depending on which McCain ad you see, Johnny Walnuts thinks Obama is either a rock star or Charlton Heston wannabee. As the ads correctly assert, the O-Man can fire up a crowd and get them thinking seditiously about hope and change. However, McCain seems to think the ability to talk ...

A Roadie for the Rock Star

Wednesday, August 6th, 2008

Depending on which McCain ad you see, Johnny Walnuts thinks Obama is either a rock star or Charlton Heston wannabee. As the ads correctly assert, the O-Man can fire up a crowd and get them thinking seditiously about hope and change. However, McCain seems to think the ability to talk ...

The Messiah and His Disciples

Tuesday, August 5th, 2008

There are few things the Bush administration has done well except keep "the bubble" intact. No news in, no news out, give the Big Guy plenty of quasi-plausible deniability. It wasn't until well into his second term that leaks appeared, but when you run that many scams it's inevitable that ...

Walmart Is Hiring Islamic Extremists

Friday, August 1st, 2008

East Asshat, AR - Walmart executives were accused today of trying to pressure their workers to vote Republican in the fall. In one meeting, a Walmart executive reportedly said, "I am not telling you how to vote, but if the Democrats win, this bill will pass and you won't have ...

The Optional President

Friday, August 1st, 2008

Many call George Bush the Imperial President - although he thinks he's more of a new messiah fella. I prefer to call him the Optional President. He behaves as if the law is nothing more than a rough guideline he can opt into or out of like a failed bank's ...

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